Hair (16/10/2006 17:30)
Well, what to blog about today?
I could work out what happened after that gun went of, but i can't face it today so i won't.
I could post a nice picture of my recent form, like this..
or even emphasise a particularly potent run like this...
but that would be tempting fate. Gloating could very well bring this run to an end and so i can't risk it.
So what to blog on? Nothing is pressing in on my life significantly at the moment. I am relatively happy in life. But there is one thing that has become something of a worry.
I am approaching my 26th birthday on thursday of this week (a date i share, interestingly enough, with the lovely Miss Spoons - whose profile has been viewed an astonishing 44 times so far today! my hat is off to you!) and the nature of ageing has come to the forefront of my mind in a very odd way.
I am not too worried that my chances of becoming a professional footballer are now, realistically, very small. I am not worried that i no longer qualify for a young persons railcard. I am even not bothered that, should i choose to enter x-factor (for our overseas friends, like American idol but with groups and rivalry) i would be in the older age group. None of this is an issue with me.
What i find disconcerting is the hair situation. Not on my head i might add - I still have a full, thick, head full of hair that my barber has reliably informed me will last me well into my 70s - but rather the expansive growth of hair in areas where, to my mind there should be none.
Take, for example, the part of my fingers between the second and third knuckle (counting from the back of the hand towards the fingertip - it must have a name - any ideas?).
Why on earth would i need hair there? It provides no service for warmth as it is too sparsely populated; it does not serve the purpose of blocking infetions like in the ears or nose (and i dispute the usefulness of hair for these purposes too - what kind of self respecting germ couldn't get through the gap between nose hairs? It must be drunken germs!). Nor does it provide any kind of sexual attraction for members of the opposite sex, as far as i am aware? Do the ladies out there like a good hairy finger on a man? In short, the hair in this spot is, unlike all other hair, completely devoid of funtion.
What is more, it is possibly the most painful hair in the world to remove. Those of you out there who have plucked nose hair may disagree - but the pain of plucking nose hair is cumulative - the pain of one is bad but one is never enough so by the time you reach eight or nine you are in agony. Plucking a hair out of the back of your finger actually does hurt like hell. On its own! Gent's (and possibly ladies) i urge you not to try. Eyes will water, blood will flow. Those suckers are deep.
But i am (almost) 26 - is this going to get worse and worse until i die or subject myself to electroysis to remove it? Will i just have to put up with having hands like a gorilla? Or will i, in a desperate attempt to maintain the smoothness of my youth, resort to shaving the backs of my hands! I do not look forward to the day i make that choice! I hope this growth stabalises soon.
Nasal growth is another worry, but i have that under control (to a certain extent - i am plucking those blighters faster than they are growing). There is a chance that one day they'll reach critical mass and overgrow my nostrils altogether, but that can always be hidded by a nice bushy moustache. But the finger thing is doing my head in, as i can't exactly backcomb my arm hair down to mask it - I'd look like teenwolf!
So there you have it, a small if odd (an i imagine slightly disgusting) window on my life. I realised i don't give much of myself away in these blogs, and i am sorry for that in one way, and not so sorry in another. I'll maintain the enigma if you don't mind - it serves me well. That said, i shall include here a picture of me in non-everyday attire to give you a general idea of what i look like:
Hope you enjoyed that like i did - maybe i'll do that again sometime! I shall be back soon, promise.
PS:- a friend of mine is cycling round cambodia for the International Childcare Trust (www.ict-uk.org) charity. The details are here if you are interested in sponsoring him. He may shave his legs for added aerodynamism but i'm not confident that wasn't just pub talk...
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